Perfect Prayer
“Did I pray that correctly?”
I’m sometimes asked this question by a friend when we meet for prayer. After she completes a brief time of leading our petitions, she occasionally gives voice to this fear: “Did I pray OK?” She worries that she isn’t using the right words in the right way. She frets that she doesn’t have the right emphasis and the right emotions.
Another friend regularly asks me to pray on his behalf, something I am honored to do. But there are times when he prefaces his request with remarks like this: “You always pray better than I do. You always know just what to say. I think God’s more likely to answer your prayer about this than he is mine.” My friend doubts he can produce the kind of plea that will catch God’s ear.
People of prayer have long struggled with this perspective. It’s an outlook which views God as one who must be persuaded to act. And only precise prayer-words will convince this reluctant God to answer affirmatively.
This was even a stance taken by many even in Jesus’ day. While preaching about piety in Matt. 6:1-18, Jesus warns,
“The world is full of so-called prayer warriors who are prayer-ignorant. They’re full of formulas and programs and advice, peddling techniques for getting what you want from God. Don’t fall for that nonsense. This is your Father you are dealing with, and he knows better than you what you need. With a God like this loving you, you can pray very simply.” (Matt. 6:7-8 The Message).
Some ancient mystics believed they needed the right rule, the perfect program, or the most winsome words in order to get what they wanted from God. Only those who could stitch words together into a flawless format could win over God’s heart.
Simple Supplication
But prayer is intended to be much simpler. Peter Kreeft writes about the ease of prayer:[i]
Prayer is easier than we think…We can all do it, even the most sinful, shallow, silly, and stupid of us. You do not have to master some mystical method. You do not have to master a method at all. Can you talk to a friend? Then you can talk to God, for he is your Friend. And that is what prayer is. The single most important piece of advice about prayer is one word: Begin! God makes it easy: just do it!
Prayer is easier than we think. It doesn’t require seamless sentences and faultless phonetics. It can be as natural and unscripted as a conversation with a friend. Jesus’ preferred image is that of a dialogue between a child and a parent: “Pray then like this: ‘Our Father…’” (Matt. 6:9 ESV).
Still, many of us feel the need for help. We realize we don’t need perfect prose or sanctified speech. But we’re not exactly sure what to say. We feel a bit like Anne of Green Gables.[ii] The movie features Ann Shirley, an orphaned child placed the home of Marilla and Matthew Cuthbert. One evening Marilla and Anne discuss prayer:
“Have you said your prayers?” Marilla asks Anne.
“I never say any prayers,” Anne responds.
“What do you mean? Haven’t you been taught to say your prayers?”
“Mrs. Hammond told me that God made my hair red on purpose, and I’ve never cared for him since.”
“Well, while you’re under my roof you will say your prayers.”
“Why, of course. If you want me to. How does one do it?”
“You thank God for his blessings, and then humbly ask him for the things you want.”
“I’ll do my best. ‘Dear gracious heavenly Father, I thank you for everything. As for the things I especially want, they’re so numerous it would take a great deal of time to mention them all. So, I’ll just mention the two most important: please let me stay at Green Gables; please make me beautiful when I grow up. I remain yours respectfully, Anne Shirley—with an e.’ Did I do all right?”
“Yes, if you were addressing a business letter to the catalog store. Get into bed.”
“I should have said ‘amen’ instead of ‘yours respectfully.’ Think it’ll make any difference?”
“I expect God will overlook it—this time. Good night.”
We want to embrace the simplicity of prayer promised by Jesus, but we’re so often still unsure of what to say or how to say it.
The Ready Made Prayers of Jesus
This is why Jesus introduces us to what Mark Thibodeaux calls “ready-made prayers.”[iii] Jesus’ “Lord’s Prayer” in Matt. 6 is one of these—a pre-written prayer ready to be prayed by any follower of Jesus hungry for help on praying. Through supplications such as this, Jesus takes us by the hand and walks us through a conversation with the Father. Not to show us the only words that can ever be used. But to reveal to us themes and habits that make for the most fruitful and enriching times of divine discussion.
This “Lord’s Prayer” is only one of many ready-made prayers. The Gospels are filled with other petitions Jesus himself spoke. They provide magnificent mentoring regarding prayer. There are at least ten occasions on which the Gospel authors record the actual words Jesus spoke in prayer. In them we find Jesus praying at least three types of prayers.[iv]
First, Jesus prayed inward prayers of complaint. Here, Jesus gave voice to the deepest feelings of disappointment. In his inward prayers of complaint Jesus teaches us how to look deep within ourselves and to share dark and discouraging feelings with God in prayer, to complain about our pain.
- 36 Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to his disciples, “Sit here, while I go over there and pray.” 37And taking with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, he began to be sorrowful and troubled. 38Then he said to them, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death; remain here, and watch with me.” 39And going a little farther he fell on his face and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.” 40And he came to the disciples and found them sleeping. And he said to Peter, “So, could you not watch with me one hour? 41 Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” 42Again, for the second time, he went away and prayed, “My Father, if this cannot pass unless I drink it, your will be done.” 43And again he came and found them sleeping, for their eyes were heavy. 44So, leaving them again, he went away and prayed for the third time, saying the same words again. 45Then he came to the disciples and said to them, “Sleep and take your rest later on. See, the hour is at hand, and the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. 46Rise, let us be going; see, my betrayer is at hand.” (Matt. 26:36-46 ESV)
- 33And when the sixth hour had come, there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour. 34And at the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?” which means, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” 35And some of the bystanders hearing it said, “Behold, he is calling Elijah.” 36And someone ran and filled a sponge with sour wine, put it on a reed and gave it to him to drink, saying, “Wait, let us see whether Elijah will come to take him down.” 37And Jesus uttered a loud cry and breathed his last. (Mk. 15:33-37 ESV)
- 28After this, Jesus, knowing that all was now finished, said ( to fulfill the Scripture), “I thirst.” 29A jar full of sour wine stood there, so they put a sponge full of the sour wine on a hyssop branch and held it to his mouth. (Jn. 19:28-29 ESV).
Second, Jesus prayed upward prayers of confidence. Despite the darkness and the despair, Jesus was able to pray upwardly with confidence that God still ruled, still listened, still reigned, and still cared. Through these upward prayers of confidence Jesus shows us how to trust God even in the darkness.
- 21 In that same hour he rejoiced in the Holy Spirit and said, “I thank you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that you have hidden these things from the wise and understanding and revealed them to little children; yes, Father, for such was your gracious will.” (Luke 10:21 ESV)
- 41And Jesus lifted up his eyes and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. 42 I knew that you always hear me, but I said this on account of the people standing around, that they may believe that you sent me.” 43When he had said these things, he cried out with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out.” (John 11:41-43 ESV).
- 23And Jesus answered them, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. 24Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. 25 Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. 26If anyone serves me, he must follow me; and where I am, there will my servant be also. If anyone serves me, the Father will honor him. 27“Now is my soul troubled. And what shall I say? ‘Father, save me from this hour’? But for this purpose I have come to this hour. 28Father, glorify your name.” Then a voice came from heaven: “I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.” 29The crowd that stood there and heard it said that it had thundered. Others said, “An angel has spoken to him.” (John 12:23-29 ESV).
- 30When Jesus had received the sour wine, he said, “It is finished,” and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit. (Jn. 19:30 ESV).
- 44 It was now about the sixth hour, and there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour, 45while the sun’s light failed. And the curtain of the temple was torn in two. 46Then Jesus, calling out with a loud voice, said, “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit!” And having said this he breathed his last. (Lk. 23:44-46 ESV).
Third, Jesus prayed outward prayers of compassion. Here Jesus looked outward and prayed for the needs of friends and foes alike. With his outward prayers of compassion Jesus instructs us how to passionately plea for the people around us.
- 1When Jesus had spoken these words, he lifted up his eyes to heaven, and said, “Father, the hour has come; glorify your Son that the Son may glorify you, 2since you have given him authority over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom you have given him. 3And this is eternal life, that they know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent. 4I glorified you on earth, having accomplished the work that you gave me to do. 5And now, Father, glorify me in your own presence with the glory that I had with you before the world existed. 6 “I have manifested your name to the people whom you gave me out of the world. Yours they were, and you gave them to me, and they have kept your word. 7Now they know that everything that you have given me is from you. 8For I have given them the words that you gave me, and they have received them and have come to know in truth that I came from you; and they have believed that you sent me. 9I am praying for them. I am not praying for the world but for those whom you have given me, for they are yours. 10All mine are yours, and yours are mine, and I am glorified in them. 11And I am no longer in the world, but they are in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, keep them in your name, which you have given me, that they may be one, even as we are one. 12While I was with them, I kept them in your name, which you have given me. I have guarded them, and not one of them has been lost except the son of destruction, that the Scripture might be fulfilled. 13But now I am coming to you, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves. 14I have given them your word, and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. 15I do not ask that you take them out of the world, but that you keep them from the evil one. 16They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. 17Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth. 18As you sent me into the world, so I have sent them into the world. 19And for their sake I consecrate myself, that they also may be sanctified in truth. 20“I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, 21that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, 23I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me. 24Father, I desire that they also, whom you have given me, may be with me where I am, to see my glory that you have given me because you loved me before the foundation of the world. 25O righteous Father, even though the world does not know you, I know you, and these know that you have sent me. 26I made known to them your name, and I will continue to make it known, that the love with which you have loved me may be in them, and I in them.” (John 17:1-26 ESV).
- 32 Two others, who were criminals, were led away to be put to death with him. 33And when they came to the place that is called The Skull, there they crucified him, and the criminals, one on his right and one on his left. 34And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Lk. 23:32-34 ESV).
Take Ten
Choose one of the prayers of Jesus above and use it to inspire and/or inform a time of prayer today.
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[i] Peter Kreeft, Prayer for Beginners (Ignatius, 2000), 25-26 .
[ii] Anne of Green Gables (Walt Disney, 1985), based on a novel by Lucy Maud Montgomery.
[iii] Mark Thibodeaux, Armchair Mystic (Saint Anthony Messenger Press, 2001).
[iv] See my Prayers from the Pit (21st Century Christian, 2011).
