Hard things happen to the heroes and the villains in the story of Esther. And it’s instructive to look at how each group dealt with their hardships. The villains illustrate unhealthy ways to handle trials. The heroes illustrate healthy ways to handle pain.
Again and again, when it comes to the villains, we find a similar pattern: a hardship occurs, anger or despair is felt, and then revenge or something destructive is planned.
| HARDSHIP | REACTION | RESPONSE |
| King Xerxes “suffers” the disobedience of Queen Vashti. | “At this the king was enraged, and his anger burned within him.” (Esther 1:12 NRSV) | Xerxes gathers with his officials and concocts a plan to marginalize all the women in the kingdom. |
| Two officials in the king’s administration “suffer” indignation at the king. | “In those days, while Mordecai was sitting at the king’s gate, Bigthan and Teresh, two of the king’s eunuchs, who guarded the threshold, became angry and conspired to assassinate King Ahasuerus.”(Esther 2:21 NRSV) | The two men plan to murder the king (Mordecai and Esther put a stop to the plan) |
| Haman “suffers” when Mordecai refuses to bow before him. | “5 When Haman saw that Mordecai did not bow down or do obeisance to him, Haman was infuriated. (Esther 3:5 NRSV) | 6 But he thought it beneath him to lay hands on Mordecai alone. So, having been told who Mordecai’s people were, Haman plotted to destroy all the Jews, the people of Mordecai, throughout the whole kingdom of Ahasuerus.” (Esther 3:6 NRSV) |
| Haman “suffers” when Mordecai won’t bow. | “But when Haman saw Mordecai in the king’s gate, and observed that he neither rose nor trembled before him, he was infuriated with Mordecai.” (Esther 5:9 NRSV) | The result is Haman’s wife urging Haman to murder Mordecai. |
Again and again, something painful happens, anger or despair rises, and destructive action is taken.
This is now not to lament. Lament is unhealthy when it becomes directed in destructive action toward others intended to devalue them and exact revenge on them. (Of course, justice is another matter–lament appropriately leans into justice, the seeking of the righting of righteous wrongs).
Eshter and Mordecai demonstrate a different way to lament. In them we find a pattern for the productive address of grief:
When Mordecai learned all that had been done, Mordecai tore his clothes and put on sackcloth and ashes, and went through the city, wailing with a loud and bitter cry; 2 he went up to the entrance of the king’s gate, for no one might enter the king’s gate clothed with sackcloth. 3 In every province, wherever the king’s command and his decree came, there was great mourning among the Jews, with fasting and weeping and lamenting, and most of them lay in sackcloth and ashes. (Esther 4:1-3 NRSV)
15 Then Esther said in reply to Mordecai, 16 “Go, gather all the Jews to be found in Susa, and hold a fast on my behalf, and neither eat nor drink for three days, night or day. I and my maids will also fast as you do. After that I will go to the king, though it is against the law; and if I perish, I perish.” (Esther 4:15-16 NRSV)
Hardship appears and the Jewish people lament. They symbolize their inner turmoil with an outer change of clothes–sackcloth. That is, they go public with their pain. They don’t hold it private, as if it is shameful to hurt. They allow others to see their agony. Sackcloth was a rough, dark (cf. Isa. 50:3; Rev. 6:12) material of spun and woven goat’s hair used for sacking. Garments made of sackcloth were worn during mourning (Gen. 37:34; 2 Sam. 3:31), as a sign of repentance (1 Kgs. 21:27; Neh. 9:1; Isa. 22:12; Matt. 11:21), in times of great national distress (2 Kgs. 6:30; 19:1–2; 1 Chr. 21:16; Esth. 4:1–4; Isa. 15:3; Ezek. 7:18), and by captives (1 Kgs. 20:31–32; Isa. 3:24). The symbolic value of sackcloth derived from its association with poverty; sackcloth was sometimes the normal clothing of the poor. Here, it is worn to symbolize the poverty of soul and heart.
Sackcloth, as well as the fasting engaged in by the Jews here, is always associated with prayer. It’s clear that the Jewish people take their pain to God. This eventually leads them to seek justice and to take up their role as agents of justice. Lamenting does not stand in contradiction to action. But before they act, they bring their pain to God. They voice it loudly and clearly to God.
They follow the long tradition laid out for them in the Psalms. A large percentage of the Psalms are lament psalms, instances where a person or the people of God raise their pain to God.
Mark Vroegop, in his book Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy explores what these psalms teach us about healthy lament. He says the lament psalms lead us through four basic steps for lamenting. He illustrates with Ps. 86:
In these Covid-19 times, we need to relearn lament. It’s important to find healthy ways to address the anger or despair we find in our hearts. Lament is a biblical and deeply spiritual way to do this. Don’t ignore that pain. And don’t allow it to lead you to destructive paths. Instead, lament.
