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All In: According to Benedict (Rung #8)

This entry is part [part not set] of 36 in the series All In

“As it turns out, their parents are not just sharing their time, love and resources with their children; they are also sharing the bias they carry around in their heads.”

This was Jennifer Eberhardt’s conclusion in her book Biased after reviewing research showing that children adopt the same biases as their parents, and thus the same negative thoughts and actions toward people who are different from them as their parents.

We do what we see others do. 

This is why Paul and other Christian leaders urged followers of Jesus to have positive role models in their lives:

  • 15 Even if you had ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel. 16 Therefore I urge you to imitate me. (1 Cor. 4:16 NIV)
  • Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ. (1 Cor. 11:1 NIV)
  • Join together in following my example, brothers and sisters, and just as you have us as a model, keep your eyes on those who live as we do.  (Phil. 3:17 NIV)
  • For you yourselves know how you ought to follow our example. We were not idle when we were with you (2 Thess. 3:7 NIV)
  • We did this, not because we do not have the right to such help, but in order to offer ourselves as a model for you to imitate. (2 Thess. 3:9 NIV)
  • Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith. (Heb. 13:7)

There’s a name for all of this: social cognition or social learning. In her book Christian Spiritual Formation, Diane Chandler writes about Albert Bandura who argued that we learn primarily by observing others. These could be live role models (those we know or observe in our environment). They could be symbolic role models (those we do not know, such as real or fictional characters, historical figures, etc). One of the things that shapes our beliefs and behaviors is the example of the people who are, or whom we choose to place, around us. In her book Intergenerational Christian Formation, Holly Allen points to Bandura’s work as a critical piece in the faith formation of children. Providing abstract principles for children is insufficient. They need to see faith principles lived out in the lives of others around them. 

Benedict understood this. His 8th of 12 rungs on the ladder of humility focuses on the importance of social cognition in faith development:

“The eighth step of humility teaches us to do nothing which goes beyond what is approved and encouraged by the common rule of the monastery and the example of our seniors.”

Humility, Benedict believed, means surrounding ourselves with other people who are living out the way of Christ and determining to do what we see them doing.

So, who are you looking toward? Are you being intentional about finding living role models of faith in your home, school, work and church communities? Are you actively seeking to learn from symbolic role models by choosing music, art, literature, movies and other media that bring them to light? 

One important step you might take is to adopt some role models who are different from you in race, gender, class, ethnicity/ nationality, etc. Their stories may be particularly formative for yours.

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