The second week of the Spiritual Exercises focuses on the life and ministry of Jesus. We’re to imagine ourselves called by Jesus and following Jesus through the adventure of his life.
One of the exercises my spiritual director urged me to do was to consider which of the Twelve I most identify with and what Jesus is saying to me through that identification. Consider the scene above-Jesus washing the feet of his disciples. Which one are you? What will you say to Jesus when he comes to you? What will Jesus say back?
My own imagination led me fairly quickly to Thomas. Not because of his infamous “doubting” quality exhibited in the aftermath of the crucifixion. But because of his honest question of Jesus in John 14:4-6. Jesus concludes a teaching by saying, “And you know the way to where I am going.” Thomas replies, “Lord, we do not know where you are going. How can we know the way?” And Jesus answers, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life.”
It’s a brief encounter. But it reveals, I think, something with which I wrestle profoundly. Thomas’ question is one of How? How can we know the way? That’s the kind of question I’m apt to ask. How are we going to handle this crisis at church? How will that family pay its bills? How will we choose the right college for my daughter? How will we reach all these young adults leaving churches today? How will I get all these to-do’s done? How? is a question I major in. It’s the question that leads me to worry. It’s the question that prompts endless meetings. It’s the question that wakes me up in the middle of the night.
But notice that Jesus changes Thomas’ focus. The question is no longer How? Now it’s Who? “I am the way, and the truth, and the life.” I cannot always answer How? But I can always answer Who? And, my answer to Who? ultimately leads me to better answer the question How? What matters most is my conviction in who Jesus is and what he’s capable of. Even when I’m in the dark about how he’s going to work everything out, I can still find comfort and assurance in who he is. He is the way.
In what ways are you asking How? rather than Who?
